After exhibiting work two years in the making and planning, you can come down with depression. Sometimes it’s right during the show. I remember one opening – we all went out for drinks afterward – and I could feel this immense crash right there at the bar.
So what I try to arrange now is have something all lined up to do as soon as that show is delivered - a project which doesn’t have all this build-up and expectations attached. Just something to do.
That’s what the targets meant, sort of an escape from the business of art. And this is why I hem and haw a bit at already thinking: where to show, how to show, how to present, how much money and time to throw at it, and all the usual considerations that go into the business of art. Yes, I know it deserves all that, but let’s just say it’s a lot more fun to make them than to figure out all the other stuff.
When I was a kid, I saw I Want to Live! with Susan Hayward. That film made this huge impression on me. It was about a real convicted murderer, but all I saw was this woman fighting for her life who lost – with a torrid scene of her being strapped to the electric chair. She played a lot of wayward (and powerful) women very well.